This blog is based on my personal experience of how I received discrimination as a member of LGBTQI2S+ community. The journey to self-identification can be hard, we have gathered some tips to help you along the way. Happy Pride!
In the light of Pride Month, in our first blog, we would like to discuss the hardships that come along with identifying the “self”. Life is a journey about finding ourselves and unravelling troublesome thoughts. As we celebrate PRIDE, it is not to be forgotten that many people are still troubled and discriminated by the label “LGBTQIA2S+” community.
Life is a journey of finding who you are. No matter what stage you are in life, be brave, be courageous and be true to yourself.
At the age of 16, I started questioning my sexual orientation and it took me over three years to figure myself out. It was hard and not pretty. I didn't know how to behave in front of people with my new self-identification. I was terrified that anyone would find out and life would no longer be the same.
I had so many insecurities.
What if my family and friends would not accept me as they used to? What if some guy on the street saw me holding my partner’s hand and called me a “dyke”? What if some other students in high school pointed fingers at me? People started to talk about my self-identification, calling me a ‘dyke’ and accusing me of having a filthy life. Due to this I was sort of forced to come out in high school. Some of my friends left me and spread some terrible rumours around the campus. Students who didn't even know who I was started whispering sh*t behind my back. I was hiding under all the negative emotions and kept all the question marks to myself. After a while, it finally broke me down. I started to watch coming out videos and talked to people with similar experiences. Today I can proudly say that I am a part of the LGBTQIA2S+ community without any hesitation. There are many tips that YOU can use to help you on YOUR journey to find your gender identity and sexual orientation. Here is a list of some things you can do, but is in no way exhaustive.
Educate yourself
Challenge homophobia, transphobia and all prejudice
Look for role models and make links with support groups
Seek guidance and counselling
Speak to an LGBTQIA2S+ friendly doctor
Sex assigned at birth defines your biological attributes. Biologically speaking, you could either be a female, male, or other (intersex). But gender identity is a social construct of how you express yourselves through masculinity and/or femininity. Sexual orientation is defined as who you are emotionally and physically attracted to. This attraction could be towards any gender identity. “Complicated” doesn't even begin to describe self-identification. It is a confusing process to come to terms with who you really are and who you want to be. As you can see, there are no right or wrong answers when it comes to gender identity and sexual orientation.
Research shows that 26% of highschools students in the GTA are subjected to transphobic or homophobic comments. This statistic was stated after Bill C-16 was passed in 2017. Bill C-16 is an enactment that amends the Canadian Human Rights Act to add gender identity and gender expression to the list of prohibited grounds of discrimination.
In other words, it is now illegal to call me a “dyke.” But the question remains as to why 26% of high school students in the GTA still experienced homophobic slurs. Also, it is important to keep in mind that 26% is the reported percentage. There is no way of knowing what the actual percentage is as highschool students are not likely to report such bullying.
Maybe you haven’t quite figured yourself yet. Or you have already made the bold move of coming out, but it wasn’t received quite nicely by your family and peers. Or perhaps, even worse, the exact social environment you live in prevents you from being YOURSELF. If you have identified with any of these situations, don't worry you're not alone. If you need some guidance, try out some of the aforementioned tips as a starting point.
You should be proud of who you are because, in the end, you are a LIVING, BREATHING, KIND human being, regardless of how you identify yourself or your sexual orientation. Coming out and standing up for yourself is a choice. No one can decide when you want to come out. It is up to you and only you. Don't be afraid to show the world your amazing self and embrace the rainbow.
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